If your feelings are ever invalidated by someone it’s important to stand your ground and respond in a manner that demands you be treated with respect.
Actions like this always hurt your self-esteem and mental health. While we advise you to be confrontational, or violent you have to respond with words that prevent them from invalidating your feelings.
With this in mind, we have written out 20 of the best responses to someone who invalidates your feelings. These responses have been tailored to give you the most positive impact. Each of them has been well formatted and appropriate for many kinds of different context situations.
20 Best Responses To Someone Who Invalidates Your Feelings
- I’m sorry you feel that way
- My feelings are valid, even if you don’t agree with them
- I do not need your approval, just for you to listen to me
- I’m not sure why you’re trying to invalidate my feelings, but it’s not helpful
- My feelings aren’t something I am going to argue with you about
- I’m taking a break from this conversation. I’ll come back to it when I’m feeling calmer
- Stop Being Dismissive About My Feelings it is Hurtful
- If you are so angry to talk civilly, I’m not going to engage with you until you are ready to have a cool-headed conversation
- I’m not going to let you talk to me like that
- You owe an apology for invalidating my feelings
- I’m not sure what you’re trying to achieve by invalidating my feelings, but it’s not working
- No matter how you try to invalidate my feelings, it won’t change the truth
- I’m not going to argue with you about my reality
- You are done gaslighting me anymore
15 I’m not going to let you make me feel crazy
- There’s nothing you can do that will make me doubt myself
- I won’t let you control my emotions
- You can’t take away my power, I won’t let you
- You can’t get away with invalidating my feelings
- I’m not going to let you hurt me anymore
1. I’m Sorry You Feel That Way
I’m sorry you feel that way is one subtle way to respond to someone invalidating your feelings. Like this response here, it acknowledges their feelings without agreeing with them. It can be used to defuse any volatile situation or where you don’t want to argue about your feelings.
Say, I’m sorry you feel that way, but I don’t listen to such talks anymore.
2. My Feelings Are Valid, Even If You Don’t Agree With Them
My feelings are valid, even if you don’t agree with them is a firm way to assert your feelings when someone tries to invalidate them. This response is important especially when you want to stand up for your feelings.
Alternatively, you can say my feelings matter to me, you do not have to agree with them. And I am okay with that.
3. I Do Not Need Your Approval, Just For You Up Listen To me
I do not need your approval, just for you to listen to me is a response that lets anyone trying to invalidate your feelings know you do not need their approval.
When you reply this way, you set a boundary and let the other person know that you don’t need their validation. Use this when you want to be heard and understood, even if the other person doesn’t agree with your feelings.
Say, I don’t need your approval, you just have to listen to what I have to say.
4. I’m not sure why you’re trying to invalidate my feelings, but it’s not helpful
I’m not sure why you’re trying to invalidate my feelings, but it’s not helpful in a response that implies you are aware of their manipulations. Saying this easily put an end to any form of emotional invalidation from them.
You can say my feelings shouldn’t be invalidated by anyone, especially you.
5. My feelings Aren’t Something I Am Going To Argue with you about
My feelings aren’t something I am going to argue with you about is a way to put an end to any emotional invalidation from someone.
This response helps you disengage from the conversation and protect yourself from further emotional harm. It should be used when the conversation is going nowhere or if you’re feeling overwhelmed.
Let’s try saying my feelings isn’t something I am going to argue about and this is all I am saying on the matter.
6. I am taking a break from this conversation. I’ll come back to it when I’m feeling calmer
I’m taking a break from this conversation. I’ll come back to it when I’m feeling calmer is a cool-headed response in a tense situation such as an argument. It is how you take care of yourself and protect your emotional well-being.
Always use this when you need some time to process your feelings or if you need to remove yourself from a triggering situation.
Say, I’m taking a break from this conversation, let’s talk when I’m more level-headed.
7. Stop Being Dismissive About My Feelings It’s Hurtful
Stop Being Dismissive About My Feelings Its Hurtful stands as an expressive response when someone has invalidated your feelings. This way you can put a halt to their hurtful behavior, while also telling them how this affects you.
You can alternatively say, you have hurt me by invalidating my feelings.
8. If you are so angry to talk civilly, I’m not going to engage with you until you are ready to have a cool-headed conversation
If you are so angry to talk civilly, I’m not going to engage with you until you are ready to have a cool-headed conversation is another response that you use to set your boundaries. This is very useful when dealing with an aggressive/abusive conversation or actions.
You can say, I will only engage in a civil conversation with you.
9. I’m not going to let you talk to me like that
I’m not going to let you talk to me like that is straight forward response when someone tries to invalidate your feelings. This response shows you will not tolerate any form of aggression on their part and they should learn to respect your boundaries.
Try saying, I’m not going to let you talk to me like that
10. You owe an apology for invalidating my feelings
You owe an apology for invalidating my feelings is a response that demands you get an apology from them. This tells them you have taken offense by their actions and will need them to say sorry for this. It lets them know the right way of dealing with you.
Say, you owe me an apology for invalidating my feelings
11. I don’t appreciate you trying to tell me how I feel
I don’t appreciate you trying to tell me how I feel is a good response when someone invalidates your feeling.
It’s direct and expresses your annoyance with their behavior while letting them know that you don’t appreciate their attempts to control your emotions. This comes in handy when they are trying to gaslight you or make you doubt yourself.
12. No matter how you try to invalidate my feelings, it won’t change the truth
No matter how you try to invalidate my feelings, it won’t change the truth is a response that shows them how strong your resolve is.
It shows them you see them trying to toil with your emotions but it won’t make you feel different about yourself. You use this response when you want to be heard and prove your feelings are normal.
13. I’m not going to argue with you about my reality
I’m not going to argue with you about my reality. It is a firm way to assert your reality as the dominating part of your life and emotions.
This response tells the person trying to invalidate your feelings that you won’t stoop low to engage in a debate about your personal feelings, and they can’t change your emotions too.
14. You are done gaslighting me anymore
You are done gaslighting me anymore is a response that puts an end to abuse from the other person.
This tells them you no longer accept being the victim or accepting blame for their problems. Its response transitions your position into a firm safe one.
15. I’m not going to let you make me feel crazy
I’m not going to let you make me feel crazy is one response that doubles as a mantra, especially when someone is trying to invalidate your feelings.
It shows them such behavior isn’t acceptable from you and you won’t let them make you feel that way again.
16. There’s nothing you can do that will make me doubt myself
There’s nothing you can do that will make me doubt myself is a response that is used when you want to protect yourself from their negative influence on your mind.
Always use this response in situations where there are trying to undermine your confidence or make you feel like you’re not good enough.
17. I won’t let you control my emotions
I won’t let you control my emotions is a powerful response that asserts your dominance when someone is trying to invalidate your feelings by controlling your emotions.
This shows them you are aware of their manipulating tactics and will not conform to them any longer.
18. You can’t take away my power, I won’t let you
You can’t take away my power, I won’t let you is a response that shows you are ready to stand up for yourself.
This way you let them know you won’t let them diminish your worth or invalidate your feelings. It can be used if you feel like the other person is trying to belittle you or make you feel like you’re not important.
19. You can’t get away with invalidating my feelings
You can’t get away with invalidating my feelings is a tough response when you are trying to show the other person that you’re not going to give up or back down. Use this if you feel like the other person is trying to control you or manipulate you.
20. I have no space for that kind of talk in my life anymore
I have no space for that kind of talk in my life anymore in response that creates a boundary against hurtful or abusive behavior. You decide what you allow with this response to protect yourself from further emotional harm.
Employ this when you feel like they are not respecting your boundaries or if you feel like they’re not going to change their behavior.
Final Verdict
These are just a few of the many ways to respond to someone who is invalidating your feelings.
Understand that what constitutes a good response will vary depending on the situation and your emotions. What you can do is choose a response that feels comfortable to you and that you think will be effective.
Note that you don’t have to put up with someone who invalidates your feelings because you deserve to be treated with respect, and you have the right to assert your boundaries.
When someone is invalidating your feelings, it’s okay to walk away from the conversation or end the relationship.
Our responses are good options if you’re feeling strong and confident, and empower you to stand up for yourself at any time and place.
Always choose the response that feels most comfortable to you, that’s why we have 20 of the best ones. There is no right or wrong answer, and the best response will vary depending on the situation.
If you’re not sure how to respond to someone who is invalidating your feelings, you can always take a break from the conversation and come back to it later. You can also talk to a trusted friend or family member for support.
