60 Funny Roasts to Say to Your Brother

Having a brother can be both a blessing and a curse—often in the same moment. Siblings share a bond like no other, one that’s filled with inside jokes, playful banter, and, of course, the occasional roast. If you're looking to roast your brother, whether he’s your older, younger, or even step-brother, you’ve come to the right place. In this article, we’ll share the best roasts to say to your brother, ensuring you have plenty of material to keep the sibling rivalry alive and well.

The Art of Sibling Roasting: Why Do We Do It?

Roasting your brother is more than just making fun of him; it’s a way to show affection and build your bond. It’s like a love language that only siblings understand. Knowing how to roast your brother effectively can make you the champion of sibling banter. Whether you're looking to roast your little brother, big brother, or any sibling in between, the key is to be funny without being hurtful.

Funny Roasts to Say to Your Brother

Let’s dive into some hilarious roasts that are sure to get a laugh (or an eye-roll) from your brother. These are perfect for when you want to roast your brother in a way that’s both funny and memorable.

1. "You’re my favorite annoyance, bro."

This is a classic roast that combines affection with irritation. It’s perfect for letting your brother know that while he drives you crazy, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

2. "Did Mom mix up the siblings?"

Implying that your brother is so different from you that there must have been a mix-up at birth is a lighthearted way to highlight your differences.

3. "You’re the king of chaos."

For the brother who always seems to create a mess wherever he goes, this roast hits the nail on the head.

4. "Brother, you’re more like a bother."

This wordplay roast is simple yet effective, perfect for those moments when your brother is getting on your nerves.

5. "You’re proof that aliens exist."

When your brother’s behavior is so bizarre that it can’t be explained by normal human standards, this roast is a must.

6. "Do you ever stop talking?"

For the brother who just can’t seem to keep quiet, this roast is a humorous way to point out his endless chatter.

7. "Did you forget how to think?"

This roast is ideal for those moments when your brother does something that defies all logic.

8. "Are you allergic to logic?"

A twist on the previous roast, this one suggests that your brother has a natural aversion to making sense.

9. "You’re like a human tornado."

If your brother tends to leave a trail of chaos in his wake, this roast will remind him of his whirlwind ways.

10. "Do you have an 'off' button?"

Perfect for the hyperactive or overly talkative brother, this roast asks the question we’ve all wanted to ask at some point.

Roasts for Your Little Brother

Roasting your little brother can be a fun way to keep him in check while also showing him some love. Here are some top roasts for your little brother that are both funny and a little bit mean (but in a loving way, of course).

11. "I thought we were adopted."

This roast implies that you and your brother are so different that you sometimes question if you’re even related.

12. "Are you the black sheep?"

If your little brother has a knack for standing out in all the wrong ways, this roast will hit home.

13. "You’re a master of irritation."

For the little brother who knows exactly how to push your buttons, this roast acknowledges his annoying talents.

14. "Do you exist just to annoy?"

This roast is perfect for the little brother whose sole purpose in life seems to be getting on your nerves.

15. "You’re the reason I drink."

For those times when your little brother’s antics have pushed you to the edge, this roast adds a comedic twist to your frustration.

16. "Did you break the sibling manual?"

This roast suggests that your little brother didn’t quite get the memo on how to be a proper sibling.

17. "You’re being intentionally clumsy."

If your little brother has a talent for creating accidents, this roast will let him know that you’re onto him.

18. "Do you have selective hearing?"

Perfect for the little brother who only seems to hear what he wants, this roast is both funny and relatable.

19. "You’re the champion of mischief."

For the little brother who’s always up to no good, this roast crowns him as the ultimate troublemaker.

20. "Did you just invent chaos?"

This roast is ideal for the little brother who has a unique talent for creating disorder wherever he goes.

Roasts for Your Big Brother

Roasting your big brother is a bit of a different challenge—you want to show respect while still landing a solid burn. Here are some good roasts for your big brother that walk that fine line.

21. "You’re like a walking hurricane."

For the big brother who leaves destruction in his wake, this roast is both descriptive and funny.

22. "Are you a professional pest?"

This roast is for the big brother who seems to have perfected the art of being annoying.

23. "Do you ever stop eating?"

For the big brother with an insatiable appetite, this roast humorously points out his constant snacking.

24. "You’re a perpetual headache supplier."

This roast is perfect for the big brother who always seems to cause you stress.

25. "Did you forget how to grow up?"

For the big brother who still acts like a kid, this roast questions his maturity.

26. "Are you the family jester?"

If your big brother is always cracking jokes, this roast lets him know that you see through his antics.

27. "You’re a one-man circus act."

For the big brother who always needs to be the center of attention, this roast is a playful jab at his dramatic tendencies.

28. "Do you thrive on being annoying?"

This roast is perfect for the big brother who seems to get a kick out of irritating you.

29. "Did they dial down your brilliance?"

For the big brother who isn’t quite as smart as he thinks, this roast brings him back down to earth.

30. "Did you take a crash course in being obnoxious?"

This roast is for the big brother whose annoying behavior seems almost like it was studied.

How to Annoy Your Brother: 100 Ways to Drive Him Crazy

Roasting isn’t the only way to get under your brother’s skin. If you’re wondering how to annoy your brother, here are 100 ways to do it without crossing the line.

1. Repeat everything he says. This classic move never fails to annoy.

2. Leave the door open when you leave his room. It’s a small act of rebellion that drives most people crazy.

3. Take the last slice of pizza. Food wars are a surefire way to start sibling drama.

4. Mess with his stuff. Move things around in his room and watch him freak out.

5. Change the channel when he’s watching TV. Few things are more annoying than having your show interrupted.

6. Use his phone charger. Borrowing without asking is a prime way to get on his nerves.

7. Talk during his favorite show. There’s nothing more irritating than trying to watch TV while someone’s talking.

8. Give him a nickname he hates. The more annoying, the better.

9. Hide the remote. Watching him search frantically for the remote is always entertaining.

10. Send him texts when he’s in the next room. Why talk in person when you can annoy from afar?

11. Borrow his clothes without asking. Nothing says “I love you” like stealing his favorite hoodie.

12. Sing loudly and off-key. Bonus points if he’s trying to concentrate.

13. Use all the hot water. A cold shower is a great way to start the day—if you’re not the one taking it.

14. Leave the toilet seat up. This one is especially effective if you share a bathroom.

15. Take forever in the bathroom. The longer you take, the more annoyed he’ll be.

16. Mock everything he says. Mimicking him in a high-pitched voice is particularly effective.

17. Use his stuff and put it back dirty. Whether it’s dishes or his car, this one always gets a reaction.

18. Call him by his full name. It’s like being scolded by Mom, but worse.

19. Turn off his video game. Mid-level, mid-battle, it doesn’t matter—this one’s nuclear.

20. Talk in a baby voice. Nothing makes a big brother madder than being spoken to like a toddler.

Mean Things to Say to Your Brother (But in a Loving Way)

Sometimes, the best roasts are the ones that have a little bite to them. Here are some mean roasts for your brother that are sure to sting, but won’t leave a lasting mark.

31. "You must have been made from leftovers."

This roast implies that your brother is a mishmash of traits that didn’t quite make the cut.

32. "Are you the sibling chaos coordinator?"

This roast is perfect for the brother who seems to be the mastermind behind every bit of family drama.

33. "You’re a walking irritation machine."

For the brother who just can’t help but be annoying, this roast is both accurate and funny.

34. "You’re the black sheep, literally."

If your brother has a unique style or way of doing things, this roast highlights how different he is from the rest of the family.

35. "Are you the chosen sibling irritant?"

For the brother who always seems to get on your nerves, this roast questions whether he was specifically picked for the job.

Conclusion: The Power of a Good Roast

Roasting your brother is an art form that, when done right, can strengthen your bond and create memories that last a lifetime. Whether you’re roasting your little brother, big brother, or any other sibling, the key is to keep it light, fun, and full of love. So the next time your brother gets on your nerves, pull out one of these roasts and remind him that no matter how much he annoys you, you wouldn’t trade him for anything.